Plain definitions of top, bottom, vers, side, vers top, vers bottom, dominant, submissive, switch, and power bottom, with the differences explained.
Quick answer
Top, bottom, and vers usually describe sexual roles. Dom and sub describe agreed dynamics of control or direction. The same person can use a term from each group, and the meaning can vary with the activity or community.
In penetrative sex, the partner taking the penetrating role. It does not automatically mean physically being above the other person, having a dominant personality, or preferring control. In some other sexual contexts, top can refer more broadly to giving stimulation.
In penetrative sex, the partner receiving penetration. Receiving does not establish submissiveness, shyness, or a lack of direction. A bottom can actively communicate preferences or prefer an agreed dominant dynamic.
Someone who enjoys or is interested in both topping and bottoming in this role context. Equal interest is not required. Vers is different from being undecided about whether either role appeals.
Interest in both roles with a preference for topping or bottoming respectively. The words express a lean; they do not specify a numerical split or promise that either role will always be wanted.
In gay male usage, someone who generally prefers sex other than anal sex. The activities someone includes under this label can vary. Ask what they enjoy instead of turning the word into a complete list of what they will or will not do.
A preference for taking an agreed role of control or direction in a sexual or BDSM dynamic. Dominance requires the agreement of the people involved. It is not permission to ignore another person’s preferences or boundaries, and it does not determine a penetrative role.
A preference for an agreed role of following or giving up some control in a sexual or BDSM dynamic. This says nothing about a person’s competence or confidence in everyday life. A submissive person still has preferences, boundaries, and a say in what happens.
In BDSM usage, someone who may enjoy both dominant and submissive roles. Some communities use switch for giving and receiving stimulation or for other changes in role. Because of that variation, ask which meaning someone intends rather than automatically treating switch as a synonym for vers.
Often describes a bottom who prefers more control or an active, directing role during sex. The term has varied informal uses. It is not a standardized personality type, nor can a short general-personality quiz reliably assign it from assertiveness.
If someone says ‘top’, a useful follow-up is what activity they mean. If they say ‘vers’, ask whether either role interests them now. If they say ‘dom’ or ‘sub’, discuss the dynamic and the boundaries they intend.
You can use more than one term, use a sentence instead, or use no label. The point is to make it easier for another person to understand what you want. This glossary describes common usage; it does not assign a role to the reader.
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